Those Cows

“If you see your fellow Israelite’s ox or sheep straying, do not ignore it but be sure to take it back to its owner. If they do not live near you or if you do not know who owns it, take it home with you and keep it until they come looking for it. Then give it back. Do the same if you find their donkey or cloak or anything else they have lost. Do not ignore it.”

– Deuteronomy 22:1-3, NIV

“Your heifers are out.” Those four words strike dread like no other into the farmer that hears them. I can say that with certainty, as one who has been on the giving and receiving side of them. As a life-long Cove resident, finding cows where they shouldn’t be is part of life. You never know what you might find in your yard, running down the road, or in a random field or copse. Sometimes it’s cows, but it could also be sheep, pigs, horses, turkeys or chickens. Possibly goats. It’s a never ending combo-platter of surprise.

Those who have never worked with livestock may not realize that some animals are just wily. They make it their life’s goal to escape as often as possible no matter how hard the farmer tries to prevent it. Some animals are just flighty and easily spooked and that’s just as bad. All it takes is one ornery cow to get the whole herd in trouble.

We have a small pasture on a bank. It’s not the sort of place that you can mow so we usually put a cow or two in there to keep the growth under control. We have an electric fence around this pasture. Being a small pasture, the kicker for the electric fence can pack a healthy wallop. You would not want to walk up to this fence and touch it. As we say, “It’ll bite ya.” Last year we housed a heifer and a dry cow for the summer. Their job was to eat off the pasture, lay in the sun and live the good life. Neither of them were particularly fond of humans, but the heifer would go bonkers if I got anywhere close. I could be minding my own business, not even paying attention to her and she would snort and run away.

One day, I came home from work and did not see them anywhere in the pasture. Concerned, I began walking toward the far end of it to investigate. As it would turn out, they were having a nice siesta at the very farthest end, hidden behind some trees. When I came upon them, the heifer, Miss Spooky Pants, went bananas and off she went. The dry cow, not knowing what was happening but seeing her friend running away terrified, naturally assumed I was there to murder them both and so she ran away too. They both went stampeding down the hill, towards the house. The heifer, leading the charge, reached the electric fence and did her very best cow-over-the-moon impression. That is to say, she tried to leap over it. But she was a full grown Holstein and her leaping abilities, though admirable, was not the best. Her legs caught the electric fence and snapped the wire. This enabled the dry cow to follow her, unhindered by electricity. Off they went. I was hoping when they reached the creek they would stop. But no. To my surprise, they ran straight across it into the field on the other side. A field that borders a state road. Where traffic is. What a nightmare.

Thankfully, when she saw me chasing after them, one of our neighbor’s little girls came out to help me try to shoo them back to the other side of the creek. It was much easier with two people. The dry cow, who was not as spooked, was quite taken with another neighbor’s longhorn bull that was pastured nearby (he IS quite handsome) and paused long enough for quick sniff before re-entering the frenzy. We followed them back to the creek, where they splashed across again. Thinking it might be time to get back home, they ran straight through another section of fence, also snapping it off completely. I heard the wire go zinging. Cows are so much fun. No wonder everyone wants one.

I resigned myself to sitting where they couldn’t see me and making sure they didn’t escape too far until three hundred years later when my husband arrived to get them back in the pasture and fix the fence. They liked him.

There have also been occasions where I’ve come upon wayward cows and have had to deliver the bad news to their farmer that they were out, and then assisted with the chasing, herding, shooing process. When driving through the Cove, its good policy to have a pair of cow-chasing shoes in the car.

Sometimes we might be busy and not want to stop and take the time to warn someone about what their hooved stinkers are up to. Sometimes we simply can’t for other reasons. As someone who has received the bad news on other occasions, I will say that I’m grateful when people DO take the time. There’s no obligation to join in the chase, but it’s good to at least be told what’s happening. Thank you to all who have fulfilled their brotherly duty to look after the property of another and have tried to ensure its safe return to its owner. Biblically, this duty goes beyond livestock. As it says in Deuteronomy 22:3, do the same, even if it’s a donkey, cloak, or anything else.

Quite often I’ll see on Facebook where someone is trying to find the owner of a lost ring, a cell phone, car keys, etc. Thank you for being good brothers and sisters to others. Thank you for watching after things that don’t belong to you and for trying to find where they belong. These days we don’t often lose our donkeys, but now if you see one wondering around, you know what to do.

Helpful definitions for terms used in this column

Heifer: a female cow who has never yet given birth.

Dry cow: a female cow who has given birth before, but is currently not giving milk, usually because she will be giving birth again in another few months.

Out: the opposite of in, as in “out of the pasture.” If the cows are out, it means they are running at large.

Kicker: The metal box that sends out the electricity for an electric fence.